All of us will experience loss, and dealing with feelings of loss is an inevitable necessary part of life, especially as we enter our older years. Losses may come about in different forms, but they produce similar feelings of helplessness of varying degrees.
What forms of loss do older adults encounter?
Losses can be categorized in 4 main groups:
Physical Losses
As people get older, it is common to experience changes both physically and mentally. You may notice that tasks or functions that you once considered easy or natural may begin to take on a higher level of difficulty. Some examples of these include:
- Deterioration of hearing or sight
- Increased difficulty in movement
- Reduced control over urination and passing motion
- Lesser energy and stamina
Social Losses
Social losses are often a result of physical debility. Your social life can be negatively affected when you are not able to carry out activities due to physical reasons.
For example, you may not be able to see or hear as well as you used to and may not dare to go out as often. As a result, you interact with fewer people for fear of inconveniencing others. Another example could be that if your mobility is affected, you may no longer participate in social games or sports and become much more withdrawn and sedentary.
Loss of a loved one
The loss of a loved one such as a spouse or friends could be difficult to deal with. Find out how to cope with grief and bereavement.
Financial Losses
Financial losses are stressful, especially if you used to be financially independent throughout your adult lives. Such losses may take the form of retrenchment, retirement, or even an investment gone wrong.
More so, financial losses may force you to rely on others for financial support, such as family, friends or even strangers, which may in turn lead to feelings of frustration and embarrassment.
How can you cope with losses?
There is no loss that is impossible to overcome. A major factor in coping with losses is how you perceive yourself, as well as how you view the situation you are presented with. Here are some tips on how you can handle life’s major losses:
- Be patient with yourself. Acknowledge your losses and recognise how these losses are affecting you.
- Know your feelings. It is normal to feel sad and dejected. Accept the feelings and remember that you can overcome any obstacles with an open mind.
- Keep a positive attitude. Learn to accept that losses are a natural part of life, and look towards the positive learning experiences you may encounter as a result of the losses.
- Learn to ask for help rather than wait for people to approach you. This gives you a sense of control over what you need help with and what you do not.
- Interact with other older adults and ask them to share how they cope.
- Be in a community where assistance can be extended to you, especially in times of emergency.
- Pick up a hobby. You may find new friends who share a common interest with you.
- Volunteer. You will feel a sense of belonging to a community and a sense of purpose in helping others.
- Exercise regularly and have a balanced diet. A healthy body keeps a strong mind going.
- Make your living area more elder-friendly, for example, install handle bars to assist you in the toilet and use non-slip mats in the bathroom. Try to keep your necessities within reach so that you need not depend on others for simple tasks.
As you grow older, it is normal for you to face situations where we undergo major losses in life. In spite of this, making adjustments to our mindsets and environment will enable us to continue leading fruitful lives.
The ultimate decision lies with us on how we allow losses to affect us, or if we choose to become stronger as a result. After all, if losses in life can be compared to a storm, the decisions we make can either prolong the rain, or enjoy the rainbow that comes after.